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2005-01-08 - 11:43 p.m. I have this memory of when I was very small. My mom used to attend a womens Bible study and being small, she'd simply take me along. I remember coloring or looking at books while they'd have their study and pray. The time that sticks out in my head is when a woman brought me a plate of cookies - all for myself - and told me what a well behaved boy I was for sitting so quietly. I can still see myself sitting there with my reward, knowing I'd done well. Feeling like I was somehow a special person. Being rewarded is strong motivation for anything living I believe. I also knew at an early age that problems had a cause. I was convinced my eyesight which was bad, would upset my parents, especially my mother. I refused to tell my mother or father that I couldn't see the chalk board in first grade or second grade. By third grade the school was having sight and hearing tests, which finally brought to light my deficiency. The eye doctor prescribed thick lenses for me and for the first time in perhaps my entire life, I could see the leaves on the trees. I remember being surprised that you could actually see each individual leaf. What I didn't know was that my mom had had a dream while she was carrying me, that I was born with glasses on. I'm not the only one in my family who needs corrective lenses, but for some reason this dream seemed important to my mom. My buddy Davy tells me he remembers the day I got my glasses. He says I came into our class room and everyone started laughing when they saw me and that I got very upset. I don't remember that. I do remember going to my friend Jonathan's house after school that day. He lived up snake hill (so named for the way it winds it's way up to the top of the bluff). It was wintertime and I had my coat on with the hood up, wearing my new glasses. His mom pretended not to know who I was until I took my glasses off. I think she was trying to be nice. Maybe she sensed how I felt about the different way the glasses made me look. That's the part I remember, not my school mates laughing. Just, Jonathan's mother smiling, saying "who's your new friend Jonathan?" Even since, going to the eye doctor is something I look forward to. No needles, no pain just pictures or words to look at and various lenses in the machine to help you see them the best you can. The eye doctor never made me feel like it was my fault I couldn't see something well, he only wanted to reward me with better tools for the world around me.
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